Mar 25, 2015

PDA

pocket of blossoms: pda

pda: public display of affection...yay or nay?

this question has been on my mind a lot lately. 
mostly because i feel the eyes on me and hear the whispers when i...

sit on isaac's lap,
smooch him on the cheek,
tickle him,
snuggle him,
kiss him,
give him a big hug and cuddle in his chest, 
or put my nose right up next to his face so that i can get a sweet little nose kiss...

in front of other people.

let's get one thing straight, did i include "make out" on that list? no.

now of course there is a time and place for pda. i wouldn't be doing most of those things in class, or at a business dinner, or at work. but lately i've been feeling a little bit shunned for being affectionate with my fiancé when we're with a group of people. 

i love isaac.
i love him more than i've ever loved anything or anyone.
and i want him to know that. 

so whether that be...

reaching for his hand and squeezing it,
giving him a smile across the room,
wrapping my arms around him when he's making us dinner,
giving him a kiss,
or sitting on his lap in public...

i'm going to do it. 
because i love him.

now, i realize that there are different love languages, and people grew up with different examples of love in relationships, and some may become embarrassed when they are affectionate in public. that's great. everyone expresses their love differently.

but this is how i show isaac i love him (amongst other ways), and i don't want to feel dirty or judged because i kiss my soon-to-be-husband in front of other people.

again, this is how i show isaac that i love him, not how i show other people that i love him. i don't mean to draw attention to my relationship at all. i only mean to draw my attention to my fiancé.

i also use words, service, gifts, etc. to show isaac i love him, in addition to kisses, cuddles, and hugs. so i'm not saying there is only one way to love or that i'm going to change my ways because of what people think, but i wish people understood the impact their words have on others.

i wouldn't dare share a post that was filled with such negativity, so, as i thought about how to conclude, i thought this thang needed a little silver lining. this has been going on for about a year now and i've tried to be as understanding as possible without sacrificing the affection i show isaac. this gossip about isaac and i seriously hurt my feelings.

one night i was reflecting about the circumstance i found myself in, and i remember feeling completely exhausted and torn down. sticks and stones may break my bones, but words sure do hurt me. have i ever gossiped before? yes...regrettably. i completely regret participating in any kind of gossip because now i know how it feels to be on the receiving end of that criticism. i will never forget that feeling.

the silver lining...i have changed.
not how affectionate i am with isaac,
but how i treat others (especially behind their backs).

gossip makes me cringe.
i have been trying my best to think before i speak,
and to compliment instead of judge.
i challenge anyone who is reading this to be a little kinder and a little less quick to judge.
and i take this same challenge.

and if the silver lining wasn't enough of a happy ending...the issue has been resolved thanks to the patience and love of all involved (insert smiley emoji here).

8 comments

  1. This is soooo cute!! We love it! Come and meet our adventures in Paris at Paris Living

    ReplyDelete
  2. BakingOutsidetheBoxMarch 25, 2015 at 11:44 AM

    This is a lovely article. Let's be kind. And I still kiss / hold my DH hand in public. 38 years and counting.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm sorry you feel judged for your pda :/ but seriously, enjoy every second of this stage of life while you're in it! I'm crazy in love with my husband, and we still hold hands in public and give pecks and stuff, but after 3 years of being married, it's just not as all-the-time-and-in-your-face as it was when we were engaged. Which is fine . . . life goes on and things change. But sometimes I miss those days when we just couldn't get nearly enough of being close to each other :) So haters gonna hate, but you just keep doing your thing how you want to :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Life is easier if you just dont care what other people think! :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. i agree! thank you so much for your comment, it made me feel so much better :)


    xo, k

    ReplyDelete
  6. so true! thanks for your comment jessica :)


    xo, k

    ReplyDelete
  7. such a relief! thank you for your sweet comment :)


    xo, k

    ReplyDelete
  8. i know what you mean. some couples are just more lovey-dovey than other couples. not that either is more in love, but just some couples show it more with pda and words. love languages are real!

    ReplyDelete

© NINTH OF MAY. Design by Fearne.